All of us have seen the headlines about bullying these days. Though being a PTO Mom is a lifetime away now, I can remember a situation when my boys were bullied. What I did would have landed me in jail these days.
My boys were Chase 8 and Chad 5. They rode the school bus on a daily basis. Our house was at the beginning of a road that only had a few kids on it, which meant it would drop them off and 10 minutes later it would have to drive back pass. Dragging their backpacks the boys ventured down the driveway. I could see one wiping his eyes and the other wiping his nose. It was obvious they were upset.
“What in the world is wrong with you two?” I said in almost a panic. Then as only an 8-year-old big brother could tell he stammered out the situation. “He was making fun of the way Chad talks! I told em’ he couldn’t help it! Then, they said my front teeth were so far apart that I look like a pencil sharpener!” Between the tears I found out it was a neighbor boy in his teens. This kid just made my babies cry! Trying not to let my temper get the best of me as my eyes began seeing red. In a distance, I could hear the bus coming back up the road. Without thought, I am standing beside the road. I waved at the bus driver who had noticed the boys were crying. She swung open the door and I asked to speak to the young gentleman. I stepped up into the bus and said his name. Slowly a boy, who was taller than me, slid out his seat and came forward. With every bit of restraint I could find I said in a quiet but strong tone, “I thought you’d enjoy picking on someone more your size?” He looked at me and remained quiet. “You made my babies cry. Do you feel good about yourself? I recommend you never speaking to them again. Do you understand?” A soft “Yes, ma’am” was all he said. After telling the bus driver thanks, the boys and I went to the house and drowned our woes in ice-cream. Later that night, my husband called and also talked to the teen’s Dad. I don’t know what actually changed his attitude but my son told me that he was always super nice to both of them from that point on.
Kids are cruel….but they aren’t born cruel. They mimic the world they live in.
“My Bus Bully Confrontation”
I am so proud you confronted whoever it was that mad fun of Chase and Chad. I’ve had to tell a few kids and parents just how bad their behavior is towards certain children. I’m proud to say I know your boys and I’ve always loved both of them. I had them in school, as a sub, for many years. I’ve never met any that were in anyway better than them. They were always very respectable young boys. If I ever caught anyone making fun or being down right mean to another child, you can bet I called them out on it right then and there. I’ve actually had some parents come to me with absolute hate in their eyes telling me their child did not do what I had witnessed myself. That kind of reaction from parents of bullying children is why it continues to happen today. I did not back down from this parent because the child knew he did wrong and he actually came forward and admitted what he had done right in front of his mom. I had a great respect for that young man after that and still to this day when I see the fine young man he has become, he will thank me for being so good to him in school. He went through a lot, I’m sure, but he’s a very good person. I adored Chad. He touched my heart like no other child has. He was such a loving little boy. He loved his mommy, daddy and big brother very much. He wanted to make his parents so proud of him. Of course, I knew y’all were proud of him, but he just wanted to show you, I guess, that all the time you spent with him on his school work, he wanted to make the best grade he possibly could. I was subbing for his teacher that year for several days in a row, and Chad would ask me everyday at his PE time, if he could stay in and if I would help him some more with his work that he was struggling with a bit. Of course, I told him I’d be happy to. He touched my heart in a way that I just can’t explain. He wanted to learn and do the very best he could. He wanted his parents and big brother to be proud of his good grades he made. I never had another child ask to miss his playtime in order to do school work in all eleven years I was a substitute teacher. You and Randall are amazing parents. Your boys always knew how very much they were loved and that is exactly why they wanted to make y’all proud. I knew how much y’all loved and adored your boys and how proud you were of them no matter what grade they brought home. As long as our children do their very best, that’s all we need to be the proudest parents ever. I will always remember Chad and just what an impact his precious attitude toward learning has left on my life. God took him so early for a reason that I couldn’t understand for a long time. He had so many dreams to fulfill. I can never imagine what it feels like to lose a precious child as you and Randall have faced. I do know that he loved you all very much. That young man touched not only my life, but many others, in a might way. I’m so honored to have had the utmost pleasure, having a small part in that child’s life. I love you Rhonda and I love your boys. I’m so sorry you had to let Chad go at such an early age. I want you to know from one parent to another, you are a great mom and the most important part of being a great parent is when our children describe us in that manner to their friends. We know how kids don’t like talking about their parents to their friends in fear they will be called a baby. I’m here to tell you that your boys bragged about what cool parents they had to other kids and was never ashamed for anyone to hear them. That’s when we know we are doing our job well. You and Randall are great parents and now, I’m certain, y’all are amazing grandparents. Sorry for the long remark but your post just took me back to those days when our kids were young and how I, too, can’t tolerate a bully. Thanks for sharing. Love you, My dear friend.
Aww Jane I just seen this!! Thank you and I love you too 🙂